Human Relation Patterns

The understanding and handling of human relations is definitely the most underestimated skill in all fields of live including the business of software engineering. ”...(a)About 85 percent...” of the financial success of people working in the field of engineering ” due to skill in human engineering...” (Carnegie 2010, chapter “How this book was written and why”).

This does not only concern people in management but also everyone in your company. You can even get the most for the people around you and yourself regarding everyone’s feeling and satisfaction in your private environment. Due to this fact this chapter is placed right at the beginning of the content.

Categorization of human relation patterns

Human relations patterns may be categorized accoring to the scheme of Carnegie (pattern names have been extracted partly as made-up words from corresponing chapters):

  • Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
  • Non-criticizer
  • Honest appreciator
  • Arouse in the other person an eager want.
  • Make people like you
  • Listener
  • Personal asker
  • Importantizer
  • Name remember
  • Smiler
  • Smart talker
  • Win people to your way of thinking
  • Appeal to the nobler motives.
  • Idea sympathetizer
  • Friendly starter
  • Dramatizer
  • “Yes” initiator
  • Fast admiter
  • Monolog moderator
  • Idea allocator
  • Respecter
  • Argument avoider
  • Smart looser
  • Point of view changer
  • Change people
  • Reserved asker
  • Begin with praise and honest appreciation. (Carnegie 2010, chapter “If you must find fault, this is the way to begin”)
  • Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
  • Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  • Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  • Let the other person save face.
  • Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
  • Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
  • Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.